Moonshot... and I don't mean Uranus.

There are two types of countries in the world Antoinette... those that have been to the moon and those that use the metric system!

Now of course we know that Liberia and Myanmar/Burma (not sure which name they're using this month) don't use the metric system either so we'll just let them ride our coattails for the moment. Besides, Liberia was created by the USA during our "Era of Good Feelings" and they even named the capital after Prez Monroe so let's keep the good will going. You may be wondering why the good ol US of A never got in line with the rest of the world in adopting such a uniform system... where everything is the same, stuff is pretty simple etc. etc. Well perhaps it's because it was adopted first by the French 🇨🇵at the end of the "Reign of Terror"😱 and we aren't ready to wave the white flag yet🏳, or perhaps it's because we are a nation founded on individual freedoms 🗽not mass movements, forced collectivization, groupthink, what the "fraud squad" thinks #AOC🤥, soccer⚽️ or any other form of globalization despite its easiness🤡. Instead we like to challenge ourselves. The pilgrims challenged the ocean 🚢and a far flung wilderness🐃 creating this great "City upon a hill," the pioneers challenged the frontier in expanding west,

 and then ultimately we challenged the new frontier... space, and decided to go to the moon🌙. President Kennedy said, "We choose to go to the Moon in this decade and do other things...not because they are easy, but because they are hard; because that goal will serve to organize and measure the best of our energies and skills, because that challenge is one that we are willing to accept..." We like a good challenge and overcoming the difficult. We like jumping the grand canyon on a motorcycle🏍, flying across the ocean solo🛩, breaking the sound barrier in a jet✈, and at a Guns and Roses concert🎸, drinking from a 48 ounce beer bong🍺, and speaking of ounces we like a system of weights and measures that seem to have no correlation to each other. Pounds, miles, inches, feet, yards, quarts, gallons etc📏. If it was easy then anybody could do it...even globalists🌏 and those that #feelthebern. No we like things hard. Which is why we choose to speak English. American English had been called the "Frankenstein" lingo because it's been sewn together from a lot of European languages, L.A. slang and bad accents. We even have semi dead languages like ancient Greek and Latin mixed in there. If it seems confusing, you're going to want to fill your wine glass up for this, because that's the only way you'll get some Claret -y. 🍷(I know, geez) We have words that look alike but sound different, sound alike but spelled different, spelled the same but different meanings, and words that are spelled the same and sound the same but mean different things, capiche?🤔 For instance while sitting in the bow of a canoe🚣‍♂️ made from the bark of a bough🌴 and wearing a bow in your man bun💇‍♂️, shooting arrows from you bow🎯 at the local tribe, it's a good idea not to take a bow... that would be poor sportsmanship. Or it wouldn't be fair if fair skinned people got to go to the fair 🎢for free... that would be institutionalized amusement park racism. Stop hatin', start participatin'. Remember also that read rhymes with lead, and lead rhymes with read📰, but read doesn't rhyme with lead, and lead doesn't rhyme with read. Savvy? More wine please🍾. Also, who invented the silent b? That was dumb! Well at least we have rules we can follow. Like i before e except after c. That's reliable right? 🤔Well except for the 923 words the ie follows c, and the only 40 occasions where it's right. Huh? 😶That's not very smart! In fact it happens twice in Einstein's name. What about "ough"? Cough, rough, though, ought, even weirdly...hiccough. Excuse me, I need to chug a beer🍺 to get rid of these. Of course there are other rules like adjective order. According to the eloquent Mark Forsythe, adjectives have to be in the following order... opinion, size, age, shape, color, origin, material, purpose, noun! Such as a lovely little old round red French glass wine bottle. Parfait! But what about a French glass red old little round wine lovely bottle! See? Actually, it's elementary... little American kids🙋‍♂️🙋‍♀️ can speak American good.🇺🇸 No problem. We can also make sense of yards whether they're front, back, drunk or gained on the gridiron🏈. It's because of this ability that we could create the City upon a hill, tame the west, go to the moon🚀 and come back, and survive disco🕺💃, the Biebs, Kardashians, the bad kind of Patriots (ugg), and even infantile socialistas from the fraud squad🇻🇳. We got this. We like the hard things, the tough challenges and then we like to toast to our success 🥂in our air conditioned house🏡, bar, car (when tailgating🙈), plane, rocketship🚀, etc... which we also invented. Thanks Mr. Carrier. So congrats moon trekkers👨‍🚀, moonlanders, and moonwalkers🦶... and for you all who don't like the American dream... listen to Michael Son of Jack and Beat it...

You better run, you better do what you can
Don't want to see no blood, don't be a macho man
You want to be tough, better do what you can
So beat it, but you want to be bad

Just beat it, beat it, beat it, beat it
No one wants to be defeated
Showin' how funky and strong is your fight
It doesn't matter who's wrong or right
Just beat it, beat it
Just beat it, beat it
Just beat it, beat it
Just beat it, beat it